broken heart

My heart is broken in a million and one pieces. Everett has for some reason decided he will not nurse. I guess it is a "nursing strike" which yes is a very real thing. Google it. It's some what common around this age. I have spoken to 3 lactation consultants several times each and tried everything in the book. Now all I can do is keep trying, keep my milk supply up and wait him out. HOPEFULLY he will come back. If he does not nurse before 2 pm today it will be 72 hours since he last has. When it first started I thought for sure he had an ear infection or something since he had that horrible cold. It was Sunday so the only place to take him was the Children's ER. We were having trouble getting milk into him, he was so fussy and wouldn't eat. So off him and I went. What an expensive way to learn about a "nursing strike." He is now drinking milk from a cup like a pro so we are not worried about him. This may seem silly but I am totally devastated. I just can't believe I may never get to nurse my little boy again. It kills me. John is being sooooooo supportive and sweet. I just can't stop crying about it and I know he can't possibly understand but he is trying really hard and not making me feel crazy. I know how lucky I am in soooooo many ways and I'm trying to remember that but omg this sucks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It was just taken from me too soon and too sudden. I took it for granted I would have until he was at least a year. Now it's gone and I'm lost.