crazy dude

As I sit here and type I am watching Everett cruise along the coffee table. Not only can he crawl and stand up now he can cruise to where he wants to go. He is pretty unstoppable. He also can stand on his own now. For seconds at a time but he can and is brave enough to do so. He pulls up on something and then lets go and stands like a surfer on a surf board.

No he still has not nursed. I've petty much given up and accepted it. It's just become life now. Ever changing. Kids have a way of doing that to you. I guess you just have to accept it and move on. He sees his cup full of milk and gets so happy and excited. It's cute and he cuddles with me while he enjoys it. I'm pumping he's drinking. It's working for now.

didn't know how good i had it until it was gone

My beloved coffee maker died. No warning just gone. John got his coffee yesterday but when I got up to get mine it made all the right noises and then just stopped. Such a tease. I can't drink just normal coffee. I just don't like it so when I am away from my coffee maker I just don't drink it. I'm not addicted to caffeine, I just really like coffee. But not normal coffee. It has to be special. Yes I love Starbucks but I don't just get a cup of coffee. I get a half decafe iced mocha w skim milk and whip cream in my own re-usable cup. That's my very fav but it's pricey so I only get it once or twice a week. On my bad days it's my afternoon treat, it helps pick me up. It's not a morning thing though. It's not a substitute for my morning cup from my coffee maker. Anyway we had a Senseo that made one cup at a time and at the top put this wonderful layer of froth on it. I sent J to 4 stores last night to get another in a panic and no one had any. The website says it is at those stores so that is another issue. He came home with this knock off one that uses the same pods we had. I was hopeful this morning as I got up and made my coffee. One look at it though and I knew it was crap. No froth. Can't drink it. It's horrible. Didn't realize how much I loved my froth until it's gone. Oh and this whole coffee thing is because of you Ingvild. Your family got me hooked. Thanks. hehehe John says, "you are not picky just particular." I don't care. I want things how I want them, no sense spending money on things that are not right, right?

MAMAMAMMA

Well he is still not nursing but he may have made up for it and gotten back in my good graces. Still not sure I'm letting him off the hook but he is doing good work making up for it. MAMAMAMAMAMAMAM he says. All the time and he says it when he sees me and wants me!!!! I think. The girls said dada dada first so I think he is trying to worm his way back in. It might be working.

one week

Well my little stinker still has not nursed. UGH!!! Strong willed little stinker. Still makes me want to cry but I am accepting it too. I guess. It has just become our new life, kind of. No I am not giving up but it is what it is I guess. I am pretty sure I see tooth #6 breaking thru. If so that means 3 teeth in one week!!! Oh my no wonder. And he got one the week prior to all this so 4 teeth in 2 weeks. Poor little thing. I just hope he has not forgotten how wonderful nursing is. He still always seems to want to but just will not. That's the worst part. It would make us both so happy if he did but I can't reason with him and tell him that. All I can do is love on him and be supportive.

A 5th tooth??!?!?!

No way but it's there. Saw it today. So he got #4 and #5 together. No wonder. We are hanging in there. Still has not nursed. I sooooooooooo hope he will decided to soon. We are really going to work on it this weekend. It's hard to do it wo help but this weekend when J is home "get e nursing" boot camp is in full effect. I usually win battles with my kids but this one I'm not so sure about. I hope I do though!

Av wants another baby

No way J and I say!!! The other day I was cooking dinner and out of nowhere she said "mom we can handle another kid." heheheh We had not talked about that in forever. In the past I have told her no more babies bc mommy can't handle any more but it's been so long since we have talked about that. Funny that she remembered the exact reason why there will not be anymore Hoekstra babies. Then yesterday she patted my belly and said, "mommy do you have another baby in there?" She is obsessed!!! She then went on to say she wanted another boy. I think she just wants to make things even though. heheh I don't know but it is not going to happen.

park in the rain

Yesterday we went to the park. We have not been in FOREVER. It rained so much and then was so hot it was just not park weather. Plus w the swings in our backyard and our neighbors we spend a lot of time here. Yesterday was cloudy and cool but very comfortable. We planned to have lunch in the park. We got there and played and it was pretty crowded. I think everyone felt the same way we did. Take advantage of a park day bc you don't know when you will get another. Right before lunch it started to sprinkle. We got under a tree and ate lunch hoping it would stop. It didn't but nobody left. It never got any worse but rained for close to an hour. Not enough to get us wet or anything but enough to feel it. The kids just played right thru it. No one missed a beat due to it which was pretty cool. What fun memories these kids are making. Playing in the rain was the best when I was a kid.

I had to bring my pump and pump in the park. Not ideal but it had to be done. I need to keep my supply up and it was time. With 2 little girls I could not make them leave the park to go home and pump. It will just have to be my life for a little bit. I pumped while the girls were eating. I don't think anyone else at the park even noticed what I was doing. I had my hooter hider to cover it all. I do hope pumping in the park will not have to be done too many more times.

berry picking

On Monday I was so sad and just could not pull it together. I had to get us out of this house and do something super fun to get my mind off of it. It was a beautiful sunny day so we decided to go berry picking. Marci and I had been wanting too, just waiting for a day that was not a million degrees out bc we would be wearing the babies while doing so. So off we went on Monday. We picked blueberries and strawberries. My heart and mind were not totally in it so didn't really take many pics but did get these few. The blueberries were way easier to pick bc the bushes are up higher. The strawberries are on the ground so we had to bend over to pick and that put the babies upside down. They didn't love that so didn't get many of those which was sad bc they were so good. It was like picking candy off a bush. My girls ate more than they picked I think and usually I can't get either of them to eat strawberries. They had a great time though. The tractor ride to the berries was the highlight for them.

nursing strike day 4

I'm feeling a little better. Sorry for the dramatic post yesterday. Still sad but hopeful he will come around. I just don't understand. I know I never will but still why would he do this? He wants too. He is missing the closeness as much as I am. He still very much acts like he wants to nurse but the minute I get it out and get him in position he just resists. He is being so clingy and very cuddly so I am trying to give him what he needs and that is to just hold him and be close. I guess that is the only good part to come out of this. I was nursing him but I totally was taking it for granted. I thought I would have it as long as I wanted. Now that it's been taken from me I am sitting down and really enjoying his snuggles instead of just feeding him while thinking about all the things I need to be doing. Guess that's why he did this to me. He knew he was not getting me fully and wanted to show me. I have learned to stop and smell the roses more so I guess I will just enjoy what I can get. I just wish I knew this could happen. I would have protected it with everything I had if I knew.

broken heart

My heart is broken in a million and one pieces. Everett has for some reason decided he will not nurse. I guess it is a "nursing strike" which yes is a very real thing. Google it. It's some what common around this age. I have spoken to 3 lactation consultants several times each and tried everything in the book. Now all I can do is keep trying, keep my milk supply up and wait him out. HOPEFULLY he will come back. If he does not nurse before 2 pm today it will be 72 hours since he last has. When it first started I thought for sure he had an ear infection or something since he had that horrible cold. It was Sunday so the only place to take him was the Children's ER. We were having trouble getting milk into him, he was so fussy and wouldn't eat. So off him and I went. What an expensive way to learn about a "nursing strike." He is now drinking milk from a cup like a pro so we are not worried about him. This may seem silly but I am totally devastated. I just can't believe I may never get to nurse my little boy again. It kills me. John is being sooooooo supportive and sweet. I just can't stop crying about it and I know he can't possibly understand but he is trying really hard and not making me feel crazy. I know how lucky I am in soooooo many ways and I'm trying to remember that but omg this sucks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It was just taken from me too soon and too sudden. I took it for granted I would have until he was at least a year. Now it's gone and I'm lost.

sleepy head C????

Yesterday and today C has slept till after 830!!! Its the best thing ever. She is in such a better mood and I get some nice peace in the am. Av and E were up at 730 yesterday. By 830 Av was bored I guess and wanted to wake C. No way!! I got her painting instead. We had a nice hour though. I never get time like that with just Av. Yes E was there too but he is easy. J came down and said, "its quiet in here." Yeah bc the terror is still in bed!!!! Today is the same thing. Its 830 and it's just Av and I. She got up at 8 so I still got to sleep in. Very nice.

princess

Camille told me the other day, "I want you to be the holder." hehehe she was eating pizza and wanted me to hold it up to her mouth so she could eat it. Ok princess let me feed you along with the 2000 other things I have to do.

Week 1 of summer break

Well my first week home with all 3 kids ended great. Started a little rocky but we recovered. Thanks Mom for talking me off that ledge. heheheh John was gone M, T and W so I got thrown right into the fire. Monday we went to Melissa, Caroline and Max's house for the day to play in their backyard. E napped there and the kids happily played the day away so it was great. On Tuesday we rushed out of the house to get to my class at the gym by 930. Not only did we rush to get there but I had to have a lot packed for the day. We were planning to go to the pool after so I had to pack a bag for the kids for the daycare, a pool bag, a workout bag and lunch. A lot of bags! The kids had fun in their daycare and then off to the pool I took the girls. Left E in the daycare for a bit. It was nice to only have 2 kids at the pool!! Seemed relaxing. The daycare closes at noon so I got him then. We swam for a bit and then left for his nap. We were home kind of early so that night got very long without John coming home and breaking it up. That was my night I needed my mom. Thank goodness for her. Wednesday it was super hot and our pool was closed for a Jewish holiday (ugh) so we blew up the pools in the back yard and had another yard day with Marci, Jackson, Stella and Emi. On Thursday Av had her gymnastics at 11 so we went early to get some play time in and then came home for rests and then off to her hbr. She did so well and the girls were sooooo good so it was a great day. I used to strongly dislike taking C to hbr bc there was nothing really for her to do but she has grown up a little and much better there now. I hope that continues. She was sitting in the waiting room and singing her ABCs when 2 other mom's walked in. She continued to sing real quietly and after she was done everyone clapped for her. It was really cute. I have gotten to be super friends with some of the other mom's there so I love going on Thursdays. We all can relate to what each other is going thru all having kids with needs. I don't have that anywhere else so seeing these mom's on Thursday is one of the highlights of my week. I went out with Marci that night (thanks John!!!) for a little shopping and sushi. It was just what the doctor ordered! On friday Marci and I took the kids back to the daycare and did boot camp for the first time. Oh my that kicked my butt. Hardest workout I have ever done. Then back to the pool we went. The girls just love the water. Over and over again they jumped in. We all were having such a good time I couldn't make us leave. E fell asleep in my arms in the pool. I put him in his stroller in the shade and he slept there for a long time. We stayed longer than we usually would bc I didn't want to wake him. C was soooooo tired when we did finally leave. Av's energy has gotten so high and she was not overly worn out. She can touch now in the pool and getting really good at swimming. She is getting closer and closer to actually being able to do it. C wears water wings and is totally independent with them. When John got on Friday night we had a very nice family night. We didn't do anything special, just hung out, but it was wonderful!!!

gymnastics

Avery started gymnastics today. She was soooooo excited. It's the last thing she talked about before bed last night and the first thing out of her mouth today. She was bouncing around with excitement. She needed to wear a leotard so we found one from Target. It has a little skirt on it and she was so excited to wear it. We went early so she could play a little before her lesson started. It was hard to watch much of her lesson while watching C and E but from what I saw she loved it. They were walking on 4 different balance beams, walking different ways on each of them. She was the last girl in line and fell behind the other girls. They were all a full beam ahead of her but she stuck with it, had a smile on her face and jumped off each beam with pride before moving onto the next one. They did each beam 3 times so that was a lot of work for her. My heart just swelled with pride. She has hbr this afternoon so I brought her right home for lunch and a rest (E is napping too). She is tuckered out!

These pics are pretty horrible but it's the best I could do bc I forgot my camera. The first one is her jumping into the ball pit. The second is her in the background on the beam and the third is her doing a handstand kick (that none of them did all that well). She loved it and already asked if she could do it again. Uh yea I think so seeing how I paid for 8 of them!!! Heeheheh

eating

Everett is doing great with his eating. He was way behind C on starting to chew and eat real food but he is quickly catching up. His fourth tooth is starting to show so I bet that is helping. His pincher grasp is also emerging so he is starting to get more and more actually in his mouth. He is eating bananas, cheerios, cheese and strawberries. Along with about 4 things of baby food or yogurt. He will eat pretty much any type of baby food I feed him. Love all the new baby food choices out these days and the baby food in the pouches. They are expensive but great for feeding on the go. He is starting to be able to eat those on his own. He also likes apple crisps and baby mum-mums. Love all the new baby food products out there!!!

Messy Everett

While feeding E I walked away for a minute and this is what I came back too.

Everett is 8 months!!!

My baby is 8 months today. Where did the last 8 months go? He is growing so quickly and getting so big. He is following in C's footsteps. Loves her 2 old favs. The shoes by the door and Jack's water dish. He pulls up on EVERYTHING. That's really his end goal, not the crawling. We find him standing in his crib all the time. He is starting to bang things together and starting the very fun dropping game. He eats 3 meals a day which equal about 4 things of baby food. He is starting to get the hang of chewing things. We are starting to give him more and more foods you have to chew. He is just the sweetest and happiest baby. Loves his family. Gets so happy when he sees the girls or his dad. He plays great with the girls and would not let us give them a bath and not him. Soon as he hears that water he is in the bathroom like a flash. Standing at the tub making a screaming noise until we get him in. He sleeps well for the most part. I recently cut him off at night and it has gone way better than expected. He really doesn't have a routine and thankfully he seems totally okay with that. He puts everything in his mouth. We have to be so careful. He pretty much is always smiling. He has 3 teeth. He nurses still and loves it. Will not take liquid from any other source than the boob but we are working on that. He loves it when you mimic the noises he makes. He loves to be sung too and loves patty cake and this little piggy. He is very ticklish. He just is sweet sweet sweet. Loves to be cuddled. He will crawl over to you and fall into you so you will hold him and cuddle him. If he is in his bed and you go in there and not get him out he gets MAD. So mad. He just loves life and loves his family. Pretty neat little guy!!!

my girl

Avery is so sweet. At the core that is who she is. She cares about her friends and family so deeply. Yesterday we were coming home from the pool and Camille fell asleep in the car. As we were unloading C was still sound asleep in her seat. You know how there is nothing sweeter than a baby/young kid sound asleep? Even "the terror" looks sweet and innocent while sleeping. Well Av saw that too. She saw her sister who she fights horribly with at times, the same sister who she calls the terror because C loves to do things to get under her skin, sound asleep and sweet. I watched as she leaned over and gave C a kiss. It just touched my heart. What a loving and caring little girl. I was beyond proud of her at that moment. At the heart of it all she loves her sister and knows she is loved by C as well. They are playing happily together as I write this. I am so glad they have each other.

meatball

We were heading to a restaurant last night with friends and C was getting hungry so we were trying to distract her. I asked her, "what do you think you will get to eat at the restaurant?" and she answered back with, "meatball." hehehe she is a funny kid. Here is a pic of the girls all dressed up to go. Av looked like she was 15. So pretty. Camille is just all personality. She had on a dress with pig tails and then she paired it with her green froggy boats. She was also carrying around this metal Hello Kitty lunch box and from the back she just looks ridiculously cute!!!

Belle of Louisville

We decided to start the summer off with a bang so we went on a river boat cruise today for the first day of summer break!!! It was a blast. We went with Caroline, Max and Melissa. The kids thought it was pretty darn cool. I looked like a circus freak taking 3 kids on a boat but it worked out fine. I had E strapped to me, my bag over my shoulder and carrying the stroller up the 2 flights of stairs. Luckily the girls are good on stairs and do not need any help from me. Plenty of boat staff offered to help but I pretty much had it under control. heheheh It was a lunch buffet that had ham on it. The girls will eat ham. I always call it a hot dog so they will eat it. As soon as I set their plates down they dug in before I could even cut it for them. I thought them chowing down on a full piece of ham was pretty darn funny.

that explains a lot

I see tooth #3!

Camille's breakfast

Everyday she has a hard boiled egg and a Kashi fruit bar. She is so funny. I have to tell her, "no you can't have a second egg" all the time. They are like candy to her. The one morning I was out and had forgotten to make more she talked about that for an hour. You would have thought I was the meanest mom in the world for for forgetting. She couldn't understand why I couldn't just produce one for her. She has been eating them ever since Easter when she got to pick a pretty colored one to eat. Now they are plain old white but she doesn't care.

she is ready

Sesame street just asked, "what's the opposite of up?" Av answered, "down." I said, "good job Av!" She said, "Miss Donna told me that." heheheh She is ready for kindergarden!!!

"Everett are you hungry?"

2 minutes later I had a little boy attached to my leg. I guess he was hungry and can understand what I said!

"spin-arounds"

"I want to wear spin-arounds." She means a skirt. hehehe that's all Camille wants to wear.

the end of an era

Well it's official. Av is no longer in preschool. I just want to scream at the top of my lungs for time to stop!!!!! It's so hard. She had a little graduation at her school today. John and E and I were there (today is C's last day at her school). We watched a video of all the pictures from the year and then the teacher spoke about each kid as they came up to get their certificate. She talked about how Av had a lot of empathy and would go on to do something very caring. After that there was time for hugs and goodbyes. Then John took us to Chuys for for lunch. It was yummy!! I just can't tell you how sad I am to be leaving her little school. It has been such a part of mine/our lives for 4 years now. They have been so good to Av and helped her grow in so many ways I never thought possible. I just can't thank them enough. I have walked in that school at least 3 times a week twice a day for 4 years now. As my fam grew bigger I had more kids to drag in with me. In doing that I made so many great friends. It was always my morning pick me up whether I was having a horrible morning or a great one. I will miss it so much. I know I will miss it so much that I am thinking about switching C over. It is just such a great place. I cried today for many reasons but one of the biggest is the possibility of saying goodbye to such a great place. Just not sure I can do it.

Memorial Day weekend

We had a great weekend!!! Friday we had our usual quiet night and then the fun started on Saturday. We decided that day to have a cookout. Luckily all our friends could come and that's when we had the 18 kids at our house. On Sunday we went to the pool for the first time this season. The water was FREEZING. That part was no fun but it was nice to be there again. Sunday night John and I got a date night. We went to dinner and to a movie. The Hungover 2. It was not nearly as good as the first one but getting a date night was great. We stopped off at Opa and Shellie's house for a drink afterward which was super nice. On Monday we had a playdate at at Jake's house with Abby and Emori and then went to Caroline and Max's for a cookout. The kids were totally wore out by they time we put them to bed on Monday night. They had school this week so there was no recovery time. They hung in though like I knew they could!!

it happened....

I knew it was just a matter of time. E found Jack's water dish. I had forgotten how fun this apparently is until I read how much C used to love it.

pool

I did it!! I took all 3 kids to the pool by myself for the day. We ended up having a blast but I was on high alert for the whole day. Managing the needs of 3 kids at the pool is hard. The big pool was closed which kind of sucked but spending the day at the baby pool my first go around was not to bad. We did venture to the lap pool for a bit which was even better. Av could stand, C had her water wings on and E was in his float. The girls jumped in over and over and over again. It was great. Even after all that neither girl napped.